Marriage: The 3rd ring

Philippians  2:3 Let nothing be done through strife or vainglory; but in lowliness of mind let each esteem other better than themselves.  :4 Look not every man on his own things, but every man also on the things of others. KJV Philippians2:3  Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit. Rather, in humility value others above yourselves, 4  not looking to your own interests but each of you to the interests of the others. NIV How many of us can actual say we do this in our marriages? How Many times do we try to control our spouse, without even knowing it. Telling them what they can do or what they can't. Who they can talk to or who they can't. Who they can hang with or who they can't. All these things are our way of controlling. For or own self, because it makes us feel better. At the end of the day yes our bodies are each other's. Yes. But we belong to God and so do our marriages. So let's trust God and our spouse to live according to how Good int...

Good morning! I was listening to the radio while driving back from work the other day and a song came on that I had to put on repeat! Some of you may know it, but it says sometimes you have to encourage yourself and sometimes you have to speak victory during the test, no matter how you feel... This song just blessed me! Then I thought about a friend who is having problems in their marriage and life. At a time like this when the biblical portrait of marriage is absolutely under attack, it is highly crucial that you find yourself 1. Rooted in God and 2. Speak life into your situation and into your marriage. Psalm 37:4 - Delight thyself also in the LORD; and he shall give thee the desires of thine heart. It's not that God is a genie and you just have to say a few words and then poof, insta-miracle. No. But when you truly line yourself up with the Word of God your thoughts begin to line up with the will of God. Thy will be done in earth as it is in heaven. Proverbs 18:21 - Death ...

Are you transparent in your relationship? Really think about this. Does your spouse know where you are? Do you have open communication? Not just responding to questions,  but engaging in conversation. Communicating with how your day was and what you did. Do you come home after work and if not died your spouse know where you are? If someone flirts with you or contacts you and you know it not a good idea, do you tell your spouse or do you just hold it in? In building strong communication and relationships and  trust. We need to be transparent. Yes we all are our own people and entitled to privacy. But if your cell phone is locked. WHY? If your engaging in conversation and actions you wouldn't want your spouse doing or your spouse couldn't do it with you. WHY are you doing it. What's the point? 1 Thessalonians  5:22 Abstain from all appearance of evil. Meaning your intentions may be good. But how does it appear? How did it appear to God, to your spouse. Go...

... is probably one of the hardest concepts to understand concerning marriage, but hands down the most thrilling and rewarding. Like most people out there, I know, I am not perfect. I make mistakes, some that could have had a detrimental impact on not just my marriage to my wife, but to my soul and spirituality. I had the problem that most guys deal with, pride and a emotionally stunted heart. Sure, I have always considered myself a nice enough guy, but emotionally for a really long time, I was emotionally devoid of, well, a heart. I guess you could have called me the Tin Man! Unlike the Tin Man however, I was not looking for the Yellow Brick road nor was I looking for my Dorothy to help me get to the man that would fix me up! The thing about complacency and depression and being stuck in darkness for a really long time, you get used to it. Ever try to open your eyes in the sunlight after being in a dark room for an extended time? Well guess what, it hurts! Being the Tin Man that I w...

Whats holding your marriage together? Have you ever stopped to really think about that. Is it the kids, or is it finances? Is it guilt, or fear? Or is it commitment, or love? There is at least one marriage out there that one of these things above is what they feel is holding their marriage together. But what happens when the children grow up and move out? What happens when one feels like they now make enough money to be on their own, so finances are not a factor? What happens when the guilty party  doesn't have the guilt anymore? What happens if someone breaks the commitment? Or what happens is the fairytale is over and it feels like the love has faded? Is there still a marriage, will you stay and work it out? Or has the key ingredient to holding your marriage together been missing all along? Me and my husband learned not too long ago that even if we didn't feel like we loved each other at times, if we truly loved God that was enough to work through anything. How do...

As I write this, I am sitting here reflecting over my life over the past year, the grace of God, the blessings and grace that I have reaped because of my family and I just thank God for it all! Things this time right now as I celebrate my 34th birthday could be so  different, but because I made the choice within my soul, that I love God, not just the things of God, but God himself, things have turned around in a way I could not have even imagined! My marriage has not always been a bed of roses, nor has it always felt like we involved the love of Christ in it, but when we made a conscious decision that we were not just married to each other, that we were married to Christ as well, things changed! Not just in our marriage though, but my whole outlook on life! I posted on my personal Facebook page the other day that hindsight is a wonderful thing! Tho we can't change anything in our past, but if you knew now when you knew years ago, I am sure most if not all of you would say that ...

Sometimes in marriage as well as in life we find ourselves dwelling on the past.   Whether it was something big or small, it doesn't really matter because it was significant enough to remain in our memory. I met a couple and decades had past and they were still together. But hadn't forgot the past and it was still hurtful. Isaiah   43:18 Remember ye not the former things, neither consider the things of old. What if God dwelled on our past?   Yes we're human we can forgive, but not forget. But when unwanted thoughts of the past come in our mind our job is to kick them out. The enemy is always busy and he wants to destroy marriages any way he can. And if we give a home to the thoughts and let them flourish its not healthy for us or our marriage. Pray, trust God and if y'all made it through it. Leave it. Philippians   3:13 Brethren, I count not myself to have apprehended: but this one thing I do, forgetting those things which are behind, and reaching forth unt...